9-11

People have memorial services to their own traditions.
I haven't been to New York, so I don't know how buddhists have experienced the anniversary of 9-11.
Someone asked me this after hearing the speech/poem by president Obama, which seemed to be directed to christian people only.

We as buddhists respect all religions.
Death is to us not the end, but a new beginning, and the responsibility to the past is daring to learn from it and move on. Harbouring hatred is not the way to deal with grief and it's certainly not treating yourself with respect.

The Dalai Lama gave a short message today, you can find it ::here::.

Responsibily of memorial days

All countries have memorial days. Some have them in modesty and humility, others in almost outgoing agression.

Memorial days center azround those who died, or rather, they used to.
Now the people who are left behind are far more central.

In that tendency, to support and even honor those who have lost a loved one, there's a huge danger.
Not only of taking away the private aspect of grief, with the risk of keeping people away from moving on in a healthy way, but also of neglecting those who also need support after a major event that took the lives of others.

Survivors of terrorist attacks, natural disasters and other events where peope died can feel a tremendous feeling of guilt. They don't understand why they have survived and sometimes even feel they haven't done enough to assist others during the disaster. This guilt may develop into severe depression and even suicide.

Acknowledging and honoring the survivors, celebrating life, should be also an important aspect of memorial days or weeks.

In The Netherlands Memorial day is celebrated at may 4th. It's celebrated with dignity and respect for all who died during wars and peace missions.
The day after freedom is celebrated. All over the country festivities, open air concerts and children events take place.
The message that is conveyed is clear: death and survival belong to each other and each have their own place.

An open year

Isn't it wonderful to mark the beginning of a new year with fireworks?
OK, it's not very good for the environment, and the animals simply hate it, but I'm thinking more of the old ways people marked new beginnings.

First they got rid of the bad spirits by making a lot of noise.
When they were gone, one could have an open look into the future.

Without realising that millions of people open the new year with a lot of noise.

Great!

Happy new year!

In need and karma

I've often heard stories about people who really needed something and got it at their deepest moment of despair.

Like that couple that had a small child during war and had to flee their own home.
They took food and water with them, but ran out of all of it.

After a while the breastfeeding started to diminish and the baby started to lose weight.
All seemed to be lost. And on top of it, they were lost too.
Somewhere in a wood. They didn't know where to go.

They hoped to find some food. Maybe berries, maybe something else. But it was too early in the year.

At last, too tired to go on, they sat down at the side of a small road.

A car passed, but it didn't stop.
Another one and another one.
They dozed off, expecting nothing.
Then the car of a backery passed. Even this one didn't stop.
But when it was almost out of eyesight  something fell off.
It was a loaf of bread.

More cars passed, but they were too bussy to eat the bread.

Then they fell asleep and would have died because of the cold.
An old farmer, on his way home, saw them and went to see if they were still alive.

He took them with him.

death of a baby

When my second baby was born, and died a day later, I was pulled through time by events which went by so fast, that we hardly had the time to celebrate life itself.

My worst fear was that I would never ever remember her face again.

But I did.
And then I realised how much her soul had touched mine.
How much she gave to me in those few hours and during the years I also realised she had given me much more.

No teacher could have taught me better than that small lovely baby that death belongs to live itself.

When one says that all souls, all spirits, all beings belong together, it also means that those between lives stay with us.

And that's what I have experienced through the years.

My little lady had a message to the world and she left it for us to find it.

She taught me that I'm not afraid of death.
And that we have to accept what happens in our lives, that we have to let go of the pain, to be able to be in touch with ourselves again.