Do you listen to gossip?

Do you listen to gossip?
Or are you a person who takes every lesson for the truth?

The Dalai Lama says:

"Believe nothing,
no matter where you read it,
or who said it,
no matter if I have said it,
unless it agrees with your own reason
and your own common sense."

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You can't change? You can!

Today I was talking with someone who said every so many minutes: "people can't change, so I can't change." It was almost like a mantra. A destructive one.

When people say I can't change they mean: I don't want to change, and my automatic response is starting to search for the reason.
Is it fear? Do they gain by not changing?

I think everyone can change.

The Dalai Lama says:

"When we really feel that there is some need to change,
then our minds can change.
Wishing and praying alone will not transform your mind,
but with conviction and reason,
reason based ultimately on your own experience,
you can transform your mind.
Time is quite an important factor here,
and with time our mental attitudes can certainly change."
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When the Buddha was dying,Ananda asked who would be their teacher after death.

Buddha replied to his disciple:

Be lamps unto yourselves.

Be refuges unto yourselves.

Take yourself no external refuge.

Hold fast to the truth as a lamp.

Hold fast to the truth as a refuge.

Look not for a refuge in anyone besides yourselves.

And those, Ananda, who either now or after I am dead,

Shall be a lamp unto themselves,

Shall betake themselves as no external refuge,

But holding fast to the truth as their lamp,

Holding fast to the truth as their refuge,

Shall not look for refuge to anyone else besides themselves,

It is they who shall reach to the very topmost height;

But they must be anxious to learn.

Quoted in Joseph Goldstein, The Experience of Insight

No texts

 In some religions heathens or people who haven't been in contact with the teachings of that religion are not appreciated.

In buddhism we value everyone.

It's said:

Even if he does not quote appropriate texts much,

if he follows the principles of the Teaching

by getting rid of greed, hatred and delusion, 

deep of insight and with a mind free from attachment, 

not clinging to anything in this world or the next --

that man is a partner in the Holy Life.

Dhammapada

See virtue

It's easy to find fault with people.
Doing so is of all ages.

How to see good in people?

A quote.

One day I complained to Suzuki Roshi about the people I was working with.
He listened intently.
Finally he said,
"If you want to see virtue, you have to have a calm mind."
 
"To Shine One Corner of the World: Moments with Shuryu Suzuki" 
(Edited by David Chadwick)

Mistakes

Buddhism requires a constant willingness to develop oneself.
It doesn't matter when you make mistakes, as long as you try.

A wonderful quote states:

There are only two mistakes one can make 

along the road to truth; 

not going all the way, 

and not starting.

Buddha

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Buddhism and your common sense

I've been raised with many dogma's and I'm still amazed by how easy people accept what is said by representatives of religion.

Some people just accept everything.

In buddhism one should think and practice and see if what is told can be used in daily life.

A quote:

Believe nothing,

no matter where you read it,

or who said it,

no matter if I have said it,

unless it agrees with your own reason

and your own common sense.

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Four ways of verbal action

And how is one made pure in four ways by verbal action?

There is the case where a certain person, abandoning false speech, abstains from false speech.
When he has been called to a town meeting, a group meeting, a gathering of his relatives, his guild, or of the royalty, if he is asked as a witness, 'Come & tell, good man, what you know': If he doesn't know, he says, 'I don't know.' If he does know, he says, 'I know.' If he hasn't seen, he says, 'I haven't seen.' If he has seen, he says, 'I have seen.' Thus he doesn't consciously tell a lie for his own sake, for the sake of another, or for the sake of any reward. Abandoning false speech, he abstains from false speech. He speaks the truth, holds to the truth, is firm, reliable, no deceiver of the world. 

Abandoning divisive speech he abstains from divisive speech.
What he has heard here he does not tell there to break those people apart from these people here.
Thus reconciling those who have broken apart or cementing those who are united, he loves concord, delights in concord, enjoys concord, speaks things that create concord.
Abandoning abusive speech, he abstains from abusive speech.
He speaks words that are soothing to the ear, that are affectionate, that go to the heart, that are polite, appealing & pleasing to people at large.
Abandoning idle chatter, he abstains from idle chatter.
He speaks in season, speaks what is factual, what is in accordance with the goal, the Dhamma, & the Vinaya.
He speaks words worth treasuring, seasonable, reasonable, circumscribed, connected with the goal.
This is how one is made pure in four ways by verbal action.


Anguttura Nikaya, book of 10s, Sutta 176

A family ...

We all know that harmony is important in a family.
A positive attitude towards another and oneself prevents many problems.

I found a nice quote I want to share with you:

A family is a place

where minds come in contact with one another.

If these minds love one another

the home will be as beautiful

as a flower garden.

But if these minds get out of harmony with one another

it is like a storm

that plays havoc with the garden.

Author unknown.

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Art of living

Today I want to share a quote a friend has on her wall.

I'm sure you'll love this quote too.

The person

who is a master in the art of living

makes little distinction

between their work and their play,

their labor and their leisure,

their mind and their body,

their education and their recreation,

their love and their religion.

They hardly know which is which.

They simply pursue

their vision

of excellence and grace

in whatever they do,

leaving others to decide

whether they are working or playing.

To them,

they are always doing both.

Zen Buddhism

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In relation

.

All things appear and disappear

because of the concurrence

of causes and conditions.

Nothing ever exists entirely alone

everything is in relation to everything else.

Buddha

The way things are interconnected makes one feel humble.
Knowing this makes simplification something not done, because it doesn't justice to the nature of things

It's a long time ago that I heard a story and in it the drops of rain caught the sun and looked like diamonds.

Not long after that I took a note of a wonderful quote:

Plans

Plans can guide us towards the future we wish, and in the meantime we miss opportunities.

Morning prayers

When I was young my grandmother taught me to wake up with beautiful thoughts.
She said that there was always something to be grateful for and all I needed to do was look around.

I've kept that habit for the rest of my life and when I bird started it's own habit of sitting on the roof and peeking through my window I always had a smile on my face when waking up. Even on days I knew would be difficult.

It was the joy of the moment that stayed with me all day.
When people would act unkind I could stay kind, because of that small bird that made me smile.
It made me aware to concentrate and focus on what I was doing, not to dwell on the past or future.

Ofcourse I was curious in which way the buddhists greet their day after I realised that my ways were very buddhistic.

Those who chant sutras often chant this part of the Sukhavativyuha Sutra:

Buddhist Morning Prayer

Full of equanimity,

of benevolent thought,

of tender thought,

of affectionate thought,

of useful thought,

of serene thought,

of firm thought,

of unbiased thought,

of undisturbed thought,

of unagitated thought,

of thought (fixed on) the practice

of discipline and transcendent wisdom,

having entered on knowledge

which is a firm support to all thoughts,

equal to the ocean in wisdom,

equal to the mountain Meru in knowledge,

rich in many good qualities....

they attain perfect wisdom.

And many love this one:

A Prayer Upon Arising in the Morning

by: Venerable Master Hsing Yun

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Today is a new beginning!

It is said that "the morning hours are the best time of day."

On such a fine morning,

I recall past experiences:

I have failed,

But have never been disappointed;

I have been sad,

But have already been able to open my mind peacefully;

I have been wronged,

But have understood

that everything in this world arises and extinguishes 

according to the law of dependent origination;

I have shed tears,

But have deeply believed that tomorrow will be better.

Today, under the blessing and protection

Of your compassionate Buddha light,

I pray to you to grant me the courage

To face all challenges on this day;

I pray to you to grant me the patience

To accept all setbacks on this day;

I pray to you to grant me the strength

To carry out all work on this day;

pray to you to grant me the wisdom

To be grateful for all causes and conditions on this day.

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Please help me increase my wisdom;

Please help me open my mind.

May I be able to appreciate the wonders of sky and earth;

May I be able to be grateful for the warmth of the world;

May I be able to obtain the assistance of friends;

May I be able to realize the value of Dharma.

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Please help me become a person wealthy in spirit

Every day, may I give with joy;

Every day, may I willingly form affinity with others;

Every day, may I practice loving-kindness, compassion, joy and equanimity;

Every day, may I treat people with tolerance and generosity.

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Please help me become a brave person in life:

May I be able to purify my thoughts;

May I be able to contribute often;

May I be able to do no wrong;

May I be able to do only good.

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Please bless me:

May I possess spiritual wisdom

And the Buddha mind;

May I have prajna wisdom and compassion

And liberate people from suffering.

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

I recognize the presence of your image in my mind.

I realize that I came to the human world to be happy;

I understand that I have entered into society to contribute;

I know that I am cultivating the Way to enlightenment to benefit all.

I vow, from this moment on,

To benefit all sentient beings

And awaken myself and others every day;

I vow, from today on

To bring good fortune and benefit to the nation and the people, and

To liberate self and others every moment.

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Please accept my sincerest morning prayer!

Oh great, compassionate Buddha!

Please accept my sincerest morning prayer!

Namo Shakyamuni Buddha.

 Have a wonderful day!

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Happiness

..

Happiness is not something ready made.

It comes from your own actions.

the Dalai Lama

The way we react to experiences makes a huge difference.
Negative thoughts about people have a strong mirroreffect on yourself. These thoughts act like poison and even though it's a struggle to erase them from your repertoire, it's well worth the effort.

Buddhism offers good tools to accomplish this task: care and compassion.
Even the worst person can be excused, because even he deserves kindness.
Buddhism doesn't speak often about guilt. because many bad acts are the consequence of a lack of learning.
If the person would have known more about the effects of the acts he would have refrained from acting that way.

Happiness also follows when you're able to live in the here and now. When you're able to let go of what happened it the past (after you have learned the lesson which was in it) and when you stop worrying and act in the present with full concentration and dedication you will feel happy.

That's true.
That's why I'm always able to deal with the most difficult situations in life.
Whatever happens, my emotions stay with it, so new concentration for a new moment gives new feelings.

Good luck.

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Nonviolence

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Nonviolence does not mean

that we remain indifferent

to a problem.

On the contrary,

it is important to be fully engaged.

However,

we must behave in a way that does not benefit us alone.

We must not harm the interests of others.

Nonviolence therefore is not merely

the absence of violence.

It involves a sense of compassion and caring.

It is almost the manifestation of compassion.

I strongly believe

that we must promote such a concept of nonviolence

at the level of the family

as well as at the national and international levels.

Each individual has the ability

to contribute to such

compassionate nonviolence.

H.H. the Dalai Lama

An Open Heart
Practicing Compassion in Everyday Life 

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Striving for the truth

The past months life has been very difficult for our family.
One of the main reasons is that we were confronted with someone who had a strong inner urge to tell us how to live.

She saw fault in characteristics of our family that we were deeply happy with: the strong bond between us all.
I see it as the result of normal bonding between parents and children, a good basis to develop independence, and also a good example for how they can make their own future family into a real home with unconditional love.

She saw it as a hindrance for children to become independent.

When I tried to explain to her that we stimulate all our children to become independent and responsible human beings, she was not able to listen.
She seemed angry that I didn't agree, and I got the impression she came from a childhood where she didn't have such a strong bond. Or maybe something else has been bothering her and she saw a representation in us.

Fact was that she wasn't able to see us the way we are: a happy family.

I've been looking for a quote, and today I found one:

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In a controversy

the instant we feel anger 

we have already ceased 

striving for the truth, 

and have begun striving for ourselves.

Buddha

Concentrate

.

Do not dwell in the past,

do not dream of the future,

concentrate the mind

on the present moment.

Buddha 

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